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12/20/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

How to wake up happy

Some people think it’s nuts that I get up around 0430 or 0500 – military time for pretty damn early. This has been my habit for many years and I deeply appreciate the feeling of joy and possibility that greets each day. It is very quiet in our little condo, except for Mollie Dog’s nails clicking on the wood floor as she finds a place to settle near wherever I happen to be. 

First things first. I take my little handful of pills and as I swallow them I remember to be grateful for the many ways in which they help support my overall physical and mental health. I believe I would no longer be among the living without them. 

Fire up the coffee pot is next, then tend to Mollie’s bathroom and food and water needs, log in to my computer and put ear buds in. Morning music is another blessing in my life. I remember how my friend Mary Ann helped me build my playlists a long time ago. I might have the equivalent of a month’s worth of hours of music saved on the other little miracle – my Macbook Air.

A friend recently asked if I would help her get the best out of her Apple computer. She can navigate around a PC, but got into Apple when she retired and has never completely understood all of its features. I told her that my expertise does not extend very far because I usually only use the features of word processing and internet surfing. Nevertheless, we’ll meet at her house after the first of the year and I’ll share what I know.

There’s another reason to be happy. I have the best friends in the world. Many are like family to me – a person with very few family connections. Friends are my chosen family and I cherish every person. Truly, my family extends from my Indiana cousins to Florida to New York City to Santa Fe to right here in the Lou. 

Back to a morning routine. Read Richard Rohr’s meditation, something that often causes me to review the general state of my soul and spirit. This Advent I have been reading the daily column that my minister, Kevin, writes. I always come away with a nugget or two after reading these two men’s thoughts. 

About every other morning, in the dark before dawn, an idea for a blog creeps into my consciousness. A title is created and off I go on what has turned into a spiritual odyssey for me. I write about things that catch my attention, things that are happening right around me, or things that touch me and go through me right on to the bright white page.

I want to say something about the practice of writing. In the later years of my life I have found it to be a discipline that enriches my life immensely. I think back to the year 2017 when two miracles happened. My first grandson was born and I was there to witness his entrance, and I published my book on the Psalms. 

It’s called, “Writing With the Psalms, A journey in New Thought.” Once in a while Jan tells me about someone who wants to read it, (she is my best publicist!), and I dig out a copy to be given away. The positive feedback I get back from readers is deep and satisfying because that is exactly what I hoped for as I wrote it. Yesterday I happened to open a copy to a random page. As I was reading I was congratulating myself for creating a really good spiritual book. It will never be a best seller, but it has made a whole lot of people feel good. Lots of people have used it as a daily meditation tool.

And I consider how good it is to be of service in my immigration work and in my 12 Step life. Recently I’ve been giving an elderly woman a ride to our Wednesday AlAnon group. Just in the few minutes that it takes to get from her assisted living place to the church where we meet every week, we have discovered things we have in common. We share a love for all things James Taylor, as well as a deep respect for Unity philosophy and teachings. I gave her a copy of the Psalms book, being pretty sure that it will speak to her.

As we near the ending of a troublesome year, I thank God for the gifts that have come my way. Given the dysfunction in our government I know they are the only way to keep going strong.

12/18/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Advent silliness

Last Sunday at the service of lessons and carols at my church I got to read what I think is the best passage of them all: the chapters in Luke where the angel Gabriel shows himself to Mary and tells her that she will be the mother of God. I love this because it shows Mary’s faith and courage in accepting what is surely a mystery to her. 

Before church I saw my minister, Kevin. I told him I was fortunate to be a reader that day and to have these particular words to say out loud. “You know,” I said, “the one where Gabriel approaches Mary and says ‘Hey Girlfriend, I’ve got news!’” Keving laughed and commented, “You should say it that way!”.

Of course I behaved myself and read the text just as it is found in Luke 1:26-38. But I have often thought about making the text more contemporary, and closer to what an angel might say to a teenager. Here goes, with apologies to Bible purists…

When the angel Gabriel manifested in front of a very young Mary, he might have anticipated what an effect his news might have for a woman who was still a girl: “Hey Girlfriend!”, he said, “Have I got news for you! But, hey, don’t be afraid. I’m here because the Big All-That-is sent me. Now, what I’m about to say sounds weird, I know, but no worries, it’s all for good. If you think I’m a little crazy, I get that a lot. Most people fall down when I show up, but you’re braver than most. That’s good, you’re gonna need it. Listen, don’t worry about the biology of this announcement – you have been chosen as the best person to fulfill this prophesy.”

“So, here it is: soon you’ll find yourself with child, as we say. You gotta trust me on this, it is one of God’s biggest miracles and God knows you are just the one to help God out. You’ll be giving birth to God’s own son.” 

At that, Mary looked a little confounded. She said, “Listen, I’ve never been with a man. I might be a kid but I got the birds and bees lecture from my mom so I know how this works!” 

 Gabe had an answer for her, “Listen, God got the idea from the Holy Ghost who will be visiting you to make it happen. Like I said, no worries! Those two Holy Ones practiced on your cousin Elizabeth and, even though she is as old as you are young, she is six months pregnant. Don’t believe me, go check it out. God’s pretty good at this miracle stuff.”

Mary pondered the news. “OK, I’m in, but I don’t really get it. I’m gonna hold you to your word.” And then she added this, “Any problems and I expect to see you again with a good explanation. Plus, you better warn Joseph, too. This might screw up his reputation, not to mention what it will do to mine! You know how people love to gossip. This might be the biggest thing to ever hit Nazareth.” 

“Oh, and I’ll expect a baby shower. Babies have lots of needs and we’re not exactly made of money!” At that, Gabe suddenly disappeared from sight.

And so it is. Amen

12/14/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

My name is….

Allegra Love. That is the name of one of the best humans to walk this earth. It’s not a name you might know, unless you are from Santa Fe, and even then you might not know of all the good works that this woman does. I met Allegra when I was a school nurse at a  middle school in Santa Fe. At that time, Allegra was working for the Santa Fe Public Schools district. It was an unusual job in that she did not work as an educator. Instead she used her training as an immigration attorney to help the students and families with any immigration issues that might arise. She had been a teacher and was completely taken by the issues that the kids and their parents faced – many of them undocumented, but living and working in Santa Fe. 

Allegra put feet to her concerns. She enrolled in law school and became thoroughly schooled in immigration law, a very complex branch of our judicial system. My contact with her was to invite her to speak at our monthly wellness meeting of Social Workers, Counselors, and myself. 

Our relationship deepened as we had various experiences together. She took me to Dilley, Texas, to work for free for a week at a women and children detention camp. We joined several other immigration attorneys from around the country who were also eager to help women and their children who had been captured and detained by the US border patrol. In Santa Fe she started a free clinic for kids who wanted to apply for President Obama’s new program – DACA, or, Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals. I volunteered for the clinic every Friday and began understanding a little about the complicated and broken immigration system in our country.

I credit Allegra with my interest and eventual passion for immigration law. It’s been 10 years since I followed her advice and applied to be accredited by the Department of Homeland Security as an immigration paralegal. It has been a life changing experience and I will always be grateful to her. 

This morning on Facebook I came across her latest post:

“I haven’t made this completely clear to the community, because I have been building out resources this fall but, if you are in Santa Fe and a friend/family member is arrested by ICE you can contact me for free legal aid. Every case is different but I can certainly get in touch with your loved one in detention, evaluate the case, and help everyone figure out what the best next steps are and make a strategy. 505-451-4024/allegralove1@gmail.com. Please respect that I am not soliciting calls about all legal cases (I take those through referrals from community partners), but want to be a free resources for our community in the event of an arrest by ICE.”

This offer represents exactly who Allegra is. She also shuttles between Santa Fe and the Texas border, helping her colleagues in the very busy El Paso area. El Paso is kind of ground zero for immigration challenges that eventually spread to other parts of the country. Last year my workplace graciously sent me to El Paso for a conference where I was exposed to information about what to expect under this new administration. Everything I learned, and then some, has come to pass under 47 – actually under Stephen Miller’s evil direction.

Allegra has turned her passion into efforts to help transgender immigrants who have been detained and thrown into New Mexico prisons. The conditions in the prisons, and the cruelty the immigrants face, is unimaginable. That has not stopped her. She has traveled around New Mexico providing people with legal advice and support. She has managed to negotiate an exit from prison for many individuals.

I can’t say enough about how difficult and challenging this work is. I know she has faced some days when continuing the work seemed impossible. She has willingly paid the price that any practitioner faces after being immersed in people’s troubles and exposed to the life-altering, cruel, treatment by our government. 

“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat. I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink…Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” Matthew25:35-40. Thank you, Allegra, for living into these words.

12/13/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Soul softening

There’s something about this time of year that turns me into a real softie where just about everything is concerned. I am usually a person who likes sunshine and lots of it. But that changes every Advent and lasts into the beginning of the next year. I find myself appreciating the gray, quiet days and the especially dark and long nights. My friend Rose says this is “diesel-down time”, when becoming more pensive and quiet is called for.

Every Advent, my mind goes to thinking about Mary, the mother of Jesus. I relate to her being young and pregnant. Now, I was in my 30’s for my childrens’ births, so I can’t know what it felt like to be barely a teenager and given such a responsibility under such mysterious circumstances. But as a young woman unprepared for the real pain of labor I learned valuable lessons in the delivery room. 

I experienced pain unlike anything I’d ever felt before. But somehow the pain was a hopeful sign of the beauty and joy to come. I do admit, though that the second time around I did insist on whatever anesthesia I could have, a request that actually slowed down labor. But anything was better than my memory of an unmedicated “natural” childbirth. Then I think about Mary, who did not have the option of a spinal block, a sterile delivery room, and a handful of helpful attendants. 

The other night, at a Christian Christmas rock concert I responded to a  request to sponsor a child in another country. The brothers who performed gave the audience a heartfelt talk about a 501c3 organization called “Compassion, Inc.” For a monthly fee, I could make some difference in a child’s life. I signed up, believing that it was the next right thing to do. My boy is named Brayan, and he is a 5 year old from El Salvador. The price tag? Very close to what I spend each month at Starbucks. 

Yesterday was my best friend’s birthday. Rose attained the august age of 85. As I drove to Maplewood to meet her for breakfast my mind went to our friendship and what life would be like without it. I thought about my chosen family of friendships of many years duration. I teared up, while driving, at the deep meaning of such relationships. I was reminded never to take them for granted. More Advent tender feelings…

The deepest sadness I feel is because of the fact that my children and grandchildren live a good distance away. If I’m not careful, I will dwell too long on the joy of past Christmases and become just a tad morose. As I listen to Christmas music, all sorts of memories pop up. I have to consciously remind myself of all the blessings in my life, and that helps mitigate my self-pity.

At my workplace, the Social Workers have been extraordinarily busy organizing deliveries of food and gifts to many of our families. They spend hours qualifying clients for things like Santa’s Helpers, Toys for Tots, and the 100 Neediest cases. I am proud to work for an organization that supports these efforts, and am grateful to the women who give of their own time for the benefit of our clients. It takes hours to do what they do so graciously.

In my immigration law program, we have a private donor who gives hundreds of dollars throughout the year. That generosity has paid for so many benefits for our clients – all of whom are facing financial challenges that most of us will never experience. Our Social Worker identifies needs and figures out a way that some money can really help a family. I report periodically to our donor, who does not want any public acknowledgement of her generosity. As a result, the neediest of our clients will have food, and toys for their kids.

I am grateful for these distinctly seasonal feelings. What I need to do most of all is extend them to last throughout the year. That will be my New Year’s resolution for 2026.

12/10/2025

Today’s blot

Lynn Murphy Mark

Floating in a sea of music

For the last three days I have been blessed to attend a Christmas music performance each day. ‘Tis the Season, as they say. Two of them were by artists that I have not heard of, but I was blessed by my friend Donna’s recommendations, and happily went with her. And the extravaganza is not over yet – this Sunday I will be at the newly remodeled Powell Hall for what may be the highlight of them all. This weekend the Saint Louis Symphony Orchestra is featuring Handel’s Messiah.

Miracle of miracles, I have found a kindred soul who loves Messiah as much as I do. This discovery came about when Donna and I were driving home from a concert Monday night. We were discussing the show we had just witnessed and enjoyed. I mentioned that my music week will be complete on Sunday when I take myself to hear Nicholas McGegan conduct what I consider the most elegant music I have ever heard.

“I love Messiah!”, came from Donna. She even has a favorite version, an old recording from the 1960’s that some consider to be the most powerful performance of Messiah ever heard. Of course, I told her I would make a recording of my favorite version so she could immerse herself and hear a different take on this classic. I told her I wished I had known this about her because I would have gotten a second ticket for her for Sunday. We spent the rest of the ride home comparing notes on our favorite arias and wondering how in the world Handel had managed to compose the 260 page oratorio in just 24 days. Text by Charles Jennings completed the piece.

I couldn’t believe that there is another Messiah-nut so close to home. I told her about writing an email to the now retired soprano, Margaret Marshall, who has moved me with her performance for decades. I wrote to tell her how significant this recording has been for me, and that my children were both raised listening to John Earl Gardiner’s interpretation. Ms. Marshall’s daughter wrote me back, while her mother dictated a sweet response to my email.

Yesterday morning in the dark before dawn I went to the SLSO website on the off chance that I might snag another ticket. Usually these performances sell out, so I wasn’t particularly optimistic. Well, there are still a few seats left for Sunday afternoon’s performance. Merry Christmas, Donna. We won’t be able to sit together, but we will both soak in the music. I’m still absorbing that I have encountered a Messiah buddy so close to home.

Last night when Donna and I were driving to meet friends for dinner before a different concert she told me that she was originally going to be a music major in college. Her father was not as enthused as she was and the story goes that she became an architect instead. But music has always been a powerful influence in her life, as it has been in mine. It’s hard for me to describe the kind of bond this passion for music can create. 

Anyway, last night’s performance was by a Christian rock group called For King and Country. It was great. Loud, with a light show, and plenty of drumming, I was taken by the way I could feel the beats in my chest. The Fox was completely sold-out by fans of this group. I watched people around me singing along with the band and the two brothers who sang beautifully and energetically for two hours. Their versions of Christmas classics were fun to watch and listen to. 

As much as I have been troubled by recent difficult and brutal changes in immigration policies, I can find solace in music. It is good for my soul to soak in the talents of musicians of all genres. I am so grateful for the opportunity to leave ugliness at the door and absorb the words and notes of the Christmas season. Thank God for the inventions of the human spirit. 

12/07/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Led to action

We are starting week number 50 of the year 2025. This is astonishing to me. In many ways, this has not been an easy year. My friends and I have shared in the madness that is happening in our government, often feeling beyond outraged and helpless at the same time. It has also been a year in which I had to examine my behaviors where my compulsions are concerned. I have had to admit that I can be obsessive in my thoughts and actions. This has not been easy, and I still struggle with some behaviors that do not contribute to my wellbeing. 

I have written before about my addiction to overeating, and all the acts that go with my disease. I do have a disease when it comes to my relationship with food. My 12 Step literature tells me that I am “in the clutches of a dangerous illness, and that willpower, emotional health and self-confidence, which some of us had once possessed were no defense against it.” It is not easy to admit to this particular addiction but all the evidence points me in a direction that requires fundamental change in the way I behave when confronted with my substance of abuse.

Experience of over two years in the 12 Step group that addresses this addiction finally brought me to my knees. While I have learned some protective tactics I have also realized just how much denial I am still in. What alcoholics call “sobriety”, we overeaters call “abstinence”. The principle is the same in both groups. Indulging in our substance of choice leads down a treacherous path, and relapse looms. In my addict’s brain I have been very clever about playing around with foods that are to me what alcohol is to an alcoholic.

As we are in the midst of the holiday season, food and drink abound. Wherever I turn there are opportunities to indulge. I have to face the fact that a lot of holiday offerings are sure paths to a relapse if I partake. At the same time, I have learned so much about how to manage my life so that it makes sense and leads down healthy pathways. I am learning to be grateful for this knowledge, and to pray for the willingness to follow it. 

I struggle with my demons sometimes. But I am also surrounded by people and words that help me cope. For example, this morning’s meditation from Richard Rohr, helped me define the bleakness that comes on me sometimes:

“My good friend Gerald May shed fresh light on the meaning of John of the Cross’ phrase “the dark night of the soul.” He said that God has to work in the soul in secret and  in darkness, because if we fully knew what was happening, and what Mystery/God/grace will eventually ask of us, we would either try to take charge or to stop the whole process. May writes:

The dark night is a profoundly good thing. It is an ongoing spiritual process in which we are liberated from attachments and compulsions and empowered to live and love more freely. Sometimes this letting go of old ways is painful, occasionally even devastating. But this is not why the night is called “dark.” The darkness of the night implies nothing sinister, only that the liberation takes place in hidden ways, beneath our knowledge and understanding. It happens mysteriously, in secret, and beyond our conscious control. [2]”

I recognize this phenomenon of mysterious exposures to helpful things. My main job is to be open to these opportunities to reflect on and work out a plan of action for the present moment. If there is a veil between me and the Universal wisdom, these are times when the veil opens – if I am paying attention. I think this is the meaning of “Presence” – the ability to live into the present moment. In my addiction, I can regret the past, and ponder the future. Nothing good usually comes of lingering in either one of these states. The Serenity Prayer helps. “God, grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Thanks, and Amen. 

12/05/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

November immigration shenanigans

Ever since January 20, 2025, we immigration workers have had our world turned pretty much upside down. This is even more true for our clients who are trying to follow the legal paths to the immigration benefits to which they are entitled to apply. I have had clients who decided to drop out rather than contend with the changes. These are people who are frightened for their futures, who are uncertain if they will be snatched up and placed out of reach of friends, family, and any legal help. Living this way takes its toll on all involved.

I have a mother/son duo who have a very strong case for immigrants who are victims of a crime. We sent in their application, with all the required details showing how they had cooperated with the police to bring the perpetrator to justice. This program moves very slowly and in today’s environment, they decided to leave the United States and return to their home country of Colombia. They were too afraid of being swept up, detained, and separated. The sad part of this story is this: a couple of weeks ago they were granted Work Authorization Cards and given a “bona fide” status. Too late. They are gone. Yesterday I Fedexed their documents to them, but the chances of them being allowed to re-enter the United States are pretty slim, unless they can obtain a tourist visa. If so, I can resume work on their cases, and they have permission to work legally. 

I think I’ve written before that Green Cards and Work Cards are what people are seeking. There is no easy path to obtain either of these treasures. In the last 10 days, Stephen Miller – a rabid anti-immigrant member of 47’s inner circle – has orchestrated ways to attack both of these legitimately acquired items. For official Green Cards, the administration announced that there will be an effort to have a “vigorous reexamination of every green card for every alien from every country of concern.” This means all people from the 19 travel ban countries. In addition, there is thought being given to adding 11 more countries to the travel ban list. I have clients from Sierra Leone, one of the countries, who have legally acquired Green Cards and are now subject to review about their status.

As for Employment Authorization Documents (EAD’s, or work cards) they will be greatly affected as well. Instead of being good for 4 or 5 years, new cards will only be good for 18 months. This means basically that people must now apply to renew their permits about every 12 months. These are not free, either. Unless a person qualifies for a Fee Waiver, they will be paying $520 for the privilege of paying into Social Security – which they are not eligible for – and contributing significantly to our federal and state taxes.

Because USCIS is so slow in the renewal process for EAD’s, they have been issuing letters that extend the validity of the cards so that working folks can show their employers that they are still allowed to work legally. That practice has been halted, giving people a very tight turn-around time to apply for an extension.

Immigration officers have been told to all decisions about the granting of asylum to people who are here fleeing from dangerous, sometimes life threatening, conditions in their home country. Although it has not been publicly announced, the wording of this directive is pretty clear. Pause all aspects of asylum cases. These are cases that require going before an Immigration Judge and there are thousands of people waiting for a decision. And, 47’s administration has fired 90 Immigration Judges since the beginning of its term – adding more burden on the judges that have been spared. The word is that any judge who previously worked privately with immigration clients is on the list to be fired.

Next up are any “Afghan nationals” who are applying for legal status. All Visa and Immigration processing for these people has been halted. This due to actions of the lone gunman from Afghanistan here on a “Special Immigrant Visa” because he worked alongside of our troops in the Afghan conflict. He is being held for shooting two intelligence officers, as is appropriate. But to punish all Afghanis seeking legal status here seems excessive.

This ends today’s lesson about immigration in the United States. We who work in the field have to check almost on a daily basis if there have been any changes. Modifications are happening fast and furiously, with little or no advance warning. It is hard work, and especially hard on our immigrant friends and neighbors.

Monday evenings are my catch-up-with-current-events night. Right after a zoom meeting, at 8 pm, I fire up the television to hear what Rachel Maddow has to say. And if I’m able to, I stay up to watch most of Lawrence O’Donnell, who follows her. I consider these two people to be reasonable and knowledgeable about the state of our politics. 

Rachel often features pictures and short videos of people around the country protesting in the streets. In New York City over the weekend people gathered spontaneously to protest ICE’s presence in their city. As she said, people all over this country are gathering to make their displeasure known, even in some republican strongholds. It appears that we are amenable to waking up and seeing the truth of this administration. 47’s approval rating is down to 36%.

She also interviewed a Russian artist who is traveling the country making exhibitions of her experience in a Russian prison simply for speaking her mind against Putin and his minions. Her name is Nadya Tolokonnikova. Her message was stark and very clear – if we don’t want to become an oppressed society like Russia, we must pay attention to what is happening here and take measures to fight against oligarchy and dictatorship and outright unlawful behavior.

Speaking of which, part of what both Rachel and Lawrence had to say was about the absolutely shameless military actions happening in the Caribbean. The latest unlawful order to be issued contains the words, “Kill everyone!”. Apparently an admiral in the navy followed Pete Hegseth’s order to murder two survivors of one of our attacks on a small fishing boat. The boat was completely destroyed, but there were two men in the water still alive. They were shot to pieces based on an unlawful order. 

As Lawrence O’Donnell said, we’re not at war with Venezuela at this time, so the crime cannot be called a “war crime”. Nope. It’s pure and simple murder of two individuals who posed no threat to the ship that decimated them. That action goes against our very own military code of action. The order came from Pete Hegseth, according to people who were witnesses. Now Hegseth, a DUI hire, is claiming to support the officer who gave the order, but denying that it came from him. When 47 was asked about this he claimed to have no knowledge of the “incident”. 

I felt sick to my stomach as this story unfolded. I feel this way because I really believe the lunatics in charge are making our country into an insane asylum. Hegseth is such a disordered individual that he released a cartoon of “Franklin the turtle”, a children’s book character, dressed in military garb holding a rocket launcher. The weapon was pointed at boats. The caption was “For your Christmas wish list”. What? What? Is he really calling for a celebration of the deaths of over 80 people in recent months? 

This fight against “narco-terrorists” is in direct opposition to 47’s plan to pardon Juan Orlando Hernandez, the former president of Honduras. He is in prison for being an integral part of sending tons of cocaine to the United States, and profiting hugely from this deadly endeavor. Hernandez was sentenced last year to 45 years in prison after raking in millions of dollars in drug money. 47 claims that this individual was mistreated by Biden’s Justice Department and deserves to be freed. My opinion is that 47 is acting on his worship of dictators who are bad guys. 

Apparently, a few republicans in congress are finally reacting to the unlawful actions of the Department of Defense and are calling for a full investigation. Meanwhile, the Justice Department is attempting to schedule interviews with the 6 congressional democratic members of congress who issued a video against obeying unlawful orders. Elissa Slotkin, a democratic Senator and former member of the intelligence community, says, “This isn’t just about a video. This is not the America I know, and I’m not going to let this next step from the FBI stop me from speaking up for my country and our Constitution.”

Bravo, Senator Slotkin. I’ll try to follow your lead.

12/01/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

December thoughts

Welcome to month number 12. Hard to believe that this year will morph into 2026 very soon. Until then, there is the madness of the holidays to contend with, backed by the daily expectation that 47 and his administration will be desperately trying to change reality as we know it. But I will not let him get under my skin this month.

Weather-wise, it seems that we moved directly from late Summer into full blown Winter. Mollie Dog is not happy about the cold cement meeting her paws. I was pretty happy to see the snow on Saturday, just because the world gets so quiet and peaceful as the flakes fall. But a subsequent rainfall melted a lot of it and now the ice has become boss. More snow expected this afternoon. 

Today is my friend Vicki’s birthday. We have known each other since the late 80’s when we worked together at Saint Mary’s Health Center. As co-workers we labored hard to update the Psychiatric and CD services and succeeded in creating great treatment programs. Our friendship developed beyond the co-worker relationship and has lasted all these many years. We had a period of separation when I moved to Santa Fe and then Florida. I was not the best at keeping up with our friendship, for which I am sorry.

Yesterday we were in church together and had a chance to visit with each other afterwards. I enjoy just being in her presence. I watch her as she schmoozes with other congregants. It seems she never meets a stranger, and is friendly to all she encounters. She has a way of greeting people that makes them feel good. I’ve been a member of our church longer than she has, but she knows more names of people than I do! 

As we were talking, the subject moved to how we had influenced each other at work and in our personal relationship. When she started at Saint Mary’s, I watched her very efficiently bring the auxiliary therapy departments into the 21^stcentury. Her goal was to create a department with competent, positive people who would have a healing presence on our units. She took over the budgets for three departments and managed to clean them up and make them more productive. This was not an easy task, and there were managers under her who resented her every effort to bring about badly needed changes. 

Yesterday she reminded me that, in addition to our work within the hospital, we were instrumental in creating an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) for the three hospitals where we worked. 

Now we are both in our 70’s, with a long history of professionalism, fun, and shenanigans between us! I am grateful that we are friends at this stage of life. There is nothing quite as lovely as having cherished people with whom we can discuss just about anything. So, Happy Birthday my dear friend!!

This was also the weekend for Cameron and Xander to meet with Mr. and Mrs. Claus. Although it is hard to be so far away from them, Jackie is very good at sending pictures and reports of what’s happening now. The boys are pretty excited because their Aunt Blessing and their two cousins are coming from Nigeria to spend Christmas with them. I can imagine that the Momoh household will be filled with energy and memory-making moments.

Jackie has bought all the ingredients for Chin-chin. It is a West African/Nigerian holiday snack made of a crunchy, fried dough. Chin Chin is sweet, but not overly so, and is brought out at holidays to offer to guests. It’s like eating small morsels of crispy shortbread. Momoh made it one Christmas and I have been a fan ever since. Of course, there will be Christmas cookie baking and decorating. Their tree is already up in the living room.

Jackie sent a video of her playing the flute at a church service yesterday. Seeing her play and listening to the notes took me straight back to when she was a child learning how to handle this bit of silver mystery. She still has the knack for playing melodies, lo these many years later. Jan listened and was quite impressed. We both wish she could find an ensemble group to play with.

So December is starting out sweetly. We will put up our little artificial tree and the candles on the mantel and be quite happy with ourselves. There are Christmas concerts and the Messiah at Powell Hall to attend, and I can legally listen to carols for the next month!

11/29/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Road trip report

Well, Lucy and Ethel, aka Rose and I, are back home after a whirlwind trip to the environs of Muncie, Indiana. We were originally scheduled to drive back this morning, but wisely listened to the various iterations of weather reports and decided to leave yesterday afternoon. 

As with any good road trip there were a couple of episodes of being lost. Once we left the highway convinced that there was a Culvers nearby where we could have lunch on the way to Indiana. There was, once we found it, but it was still in the being-built stage. We settled for Wendy’s. When we got to Indianapolis we tried to navigate the Gordian Knot of highways that go around or through the city. One of the routes we chose took us off highways and led us past cornfields on state roads. Just as well. There were traffic jams on the highways and somehow the app knew to take us off of those and guide us on quieter, less traveled roads.

When we made it to our destination, we were warmly greeted by Kim and Ralph – Rose’s family. The house looked amazingly organized for the day before plans to host 10+ people, including a six year old boy, and an unknown number of dogs. The resident dog, Tux, was excited to see us, as wound up as an 80 pound lab mix dog can get. He was especially interested in what I was wearing, mostly because he could identify Mollie-Dog’s scent.

Anyway, Kim is one of the most organized people I know. In her head she had Thanksgiving Day all planned out. Guests had been assigned to bring a number of the sides, and the promise was that they are all good cooks. Indeed they are, as evidenced by the variety and quality of the food served up on the big Day. The youngest member, 6 year old Seamus, had requested a white cake for Thanksgiving, so his mother accommodated. As it turned out, Seamus had no more interest in eating white cake by the time dessert was available. So like a 6 year old with a first-time mom.

Football was on all day. The two teams we were rooting for failed miserably, handed their behinds on a couple of platters. They were perhaps the biggest turkeys of all. I believe both of the teams are at risk of missing the playoffs, but I don’t understand the rules around this. I do think our Chiefs are out of the picture. More will be revealed.

As an only child, and a single parent getting kids every other holiday, I have been blessed with many an invitation to Thanksgiving dinners. I thoroughly enjoy watching the interactions between relatives and friends. In some cases I have been forewarned about the possibility of a Thanksgiving Day kerfuffle if politics become a subject of conversation. I always keep my views to myself, figuring that family dynamics will determine the outcome. This Thanksgiving the whole household was on the same page politically save for one member. I sat next to that person and we chatted about everything but the mess that this administration has made of our United States. 

By the end of day on Thursday, the weather reports became more and more alarming. The four of us strategized an exit plan for yesterday, a day earlier than planned. But, one thing was for sure – before we left we were going to a morning showing of “Wicked for Good”. Rose and Kim had not seen it yet, and I was looking forward to a second viewing. I’m still trying to decide which of the two Wicked movies I like best. I did make a big goof, though. When Rose needed to visit the rest room I neglected to tell her that if she went at that particular time she would miss the best song of the whole thing. (“For Good” is the one I love the most.). Oh well. My bad.

We left Yorktown, Indiana, after lunch. The plan was to visit Seamus’ house, so Rose could get a recent picture with her great-great nephew. Of course, we got lost in rural Lapel, Indiana. But we were found and a picture was achieved. 

The rest of the drive was uneventful, sort of. We did find a Culvers for dinner purposes. By that time it was my turn to drive. So I took the wheel for the last two hours of the drive. As we approached Saint Louis we each had a plan in our head for which highway to take. Our plans were markedly different. Had I been a little more assertive my plan would have won and we might have shaved a half hour off. But it’s Rose’s car and she is quite sure of herself, so we took the long way home…

I loved every minute of this trip.