Bloggerlife.blog

08/16/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

How to be happy

It’s mostly been a happy week so I thought I’d write about the benefits of being happy and what got me there. For me, happy happens in the midst of tiny victories – like solving the New York Times puzzle game, “Connections”. Not that I can solve it every day, more like every third day or so. I’ll put the right thoughts together and pair the words correctly. It usually happens when I can let my mind wander around the possible meaning of the 16 words in the puzzle. Sometimes my age is an advantage because I recognize some old time words and their meanings. And then there’s “Wordle”, another word game that I find quite entertaining. I am still grateful to my ninth grade English teacher who made us learn enough new words to have a pretty wide vocabulary.

Last Sunday the week started nicely. I was a prayer chaplain for the first time at my new church. Three people came to pray, which I consider a success. I’m stationed before and after church for any prayer needs. There’s a nice description of what I hope to accomplish in the church newsletter this week: “She will offer an affirmative prayer out loud, reminding you of your inner strengths…she will pray that you are guided by God’s infinite love, presence and support…and that any joy or gratitude will be multiplied and any fear or doubt will be transformed into peace and confidence.” That’s exactly what affirmative prayer wants to call forth from the person asking for prayer.

On Thursday Jan had her follow up endoscopy to check on the state of the three large stomach ulcers that were found about 12 weeks ago. The good news is that they are all healed and she is to continue taking the miracle anti-acid super pill that is responsible. We went out to breakfast at First Watch, a place that always makes me happy. So much so that I almost ordered a Mimosa. I didn’t, for reasons unknown.

Of course the fire excitement on Wednesday was not a happy-making occasion. Our patio is still a mess of charred material and melted plastic and ruined furniture. But Mr. Upstairs has agreed to pay for clean-up, as he should. After all it was a smoldering cigarette of theirs that lit their deck on fire. 

I talked to Jackie, too. The boys are really enjoying their camp experiences, and she gets time to herself during the day. Her Summer is almost over and she will have to hop back in the school saddle before the end of August. Cameron will be 8 on August 30^th. I can hardly believe this as it seems like just yesterday that he was born and I was there to witness his arrival. Alexander got his yellow belt in Taekwondo and I watched the video of him doing some moves then breaking a few boards with his little hand. Anyway, news from New Jersey is always a source of joy. 

Wednesday I took my friend Mary for her post-accident doctor visit and she got a good report for the progress she is making. While we were gone Rose got in a nap. When I brought Mary home there was a bag of home grown tomatoes, cucumbers and peppers waiting as my reimbursement. Any garden tomatoes are a source of happy and I have enjoyed them for the last two nights.

If you can trust an AI definition of “happiness”, what I just looked up says there are three elements of happiness: pleasure, engagement and meaning. Pleasure is the enjoyment we derive from activities in order to savor the good things in life, and from finding opportunities to look for joy. Engagement means being absorbed in an activity and getting satisfaction in the process. Meaning means finding the source of purpose and significance and connecting to something larger than ourselves. 

The philosopher, Bertrand Russell, wrote this in his 1930 book, “Conquest of Happiness”,: “Let your interests be as wide as possible, and let your reactions to things and persons that interest you be as far as possible friendly rather than hostile.”  He wrote that there are seven elements that helps us to “escape from the psychological sources of misery”. These are Zest, Affection, Family, Work, Perspective, Balance, and Radiance. 

I believe I experienced all seven this week. I am grateful.