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06/05/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

About a rant

There is nothing more vehement than a good rant. I sometimes have rants in my head, within the confines of my skull. Not too often, though, I will go on a verbal tirade when something deeply offends me. These days rants come to me with some regularity when I listen or read about yet another 47 destructive decision. 

Yesterday I had a tiny car-rant on the way to meet Rose for breakfast. NPR was reminding me that the big tariff on steel and aluminum was going live. This announcement was not unexpected, but it seems so foolish. The dumbass part is the dispensation of this tariff for the UK. But one of our biggest suppliers, Canada, is fully tariffed at a 50% rate. What uninformed people, like the MAGA base, don’t realize is that our cars, food cans, and anything else made with steel or aluminum is going to cost US more.

But last night took the cake. 47 announced a travel ban on 12 countries and a partial ban on 7 others. He does this under the guise of keeping America safe from foreign bad guys. He drew a correlation between the ban and the man who assaulted people in Colorado. Now, that man happens to be from Egypt, a country that is not on the banned list. Go figure.

Anyway, I was looking at my phone and got an announcement that 47 had imposed a travel ban. I followed the alert to the actual article to see what countries are affected. I did this because my stomach tightened for my clients and I needed to know who would be affected. Afghanistan – yes. Iran – yes. The Congo – yes. Eritrea – yes. Haiti – yes. Family members that we are in process of bringing over may not be allowed to come, even though their US Citizen family members are following the letter of the law. Some people from these countries are here, applying for citizenship. The travel ban may not directly affect them because they are here. But their countries are marked and it would not surprise me if their citizenship applications are somehow affected.

But what really got me going was when I read about the additional “partial” ban of seven other countries. I quickly reviewed the list and there it was: Sierra Leone. I have a longstanding relationship with a family from this small African country and when I read those two words, my rant began. 

Back in 2019 I helped a young refugee woman from Sierra Leone get her citizenship. At the time she was in pre-nursing studies and working as an Aide on Arsenal Street. When she became a citizen we talked about her mother. Momma was here on a visa to help my client with her kids while she went to nursing school. Since she had entered the country legally, and my client was now a citizen, she could apply for a green card for her mom. We went through that long process and mom is now a Lawful Permanent Resident.

As an LPR, mom could apply for her three remaining children to get a visa to come here and make the family whole. We started this process in May of 2021. Last August the three petitions were approved. Then the hard, expensive work started. My original client who is now an RN with SSM Health Care St. Louis, became the sponsor for her siblings. It cost that family several thousand dollars for USCIS to work on qualifying the kids for a visa interview. Once the visas were approved, my Sierra Leone family would be reunited.

As of today, the three kids are simply waiting for their interviews, when they will be granted permission to come to the USA and receive a Green Card themselves. They have been thoroughly vetted by the State Department through having provided a detailed account of their lives, police clearance letters, and the assurance that the family makes enough money to support them when they get here.

The news about the travel ban does not make it clear whether or not my clients will be forbidden from coming here. In their very thick files, I have proof that they are anything but terrorists or bad people. The more I thought about it, the madder I got, and Jan had to listen to my vociferous harangue. I texted with my immigration attorney buddy in Florida and most of our texts were filled with capital letters, exclamation points, and some very rude words aimed at the architects of this travesty. 

Do I feel better as a result? I won’t until I know for sure what the status is of my Sierra Leone family will be. Meantime, in the words of Sweet Honey in the Rock, “I’m gonna stay on the battlefield!”.

06/01/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

At the feeder

Every morning I take a big cup of seeds to the cool feeder we got for Christmas last year – a feeder with a camera. It takes pictures of the birds who come to enjoy the feast. The majority of them are little sparrows, who are the most polite of all birds who visit. They make room for each other on the little platform and they share without drama. Then they will go to the ground and pick up whatever fell out of the feeder. I love watching these delicate creatures.

There are a few grackles that have made us their first stop of the day. They are considerably bigger than most of the other birds and they tend to hog the feeder until they’ve had enough. Grackles are big black shiny birds and they take up most of the seed bed. The feeder only holds one at a time. When they come around, the other birds disappear until the big boys are finished. These guys can be bullies in the schoolyard and they are highly respected. I have to remind myself that they need to eat too.

Birds need to eat sometimes up to 50% of their body weight worth of food each day. I know that the cup I bring out is barely a little of what they really need. So it is especially irritating when the one local squirrel remembers that we put out food. This guy is made of elastic because while his back feet hold on to the fence rail he stretches his body until his face fits in the seed bed. Then he helps himself. We try to keep an eye out for him and chase him away so the birds can help themselves. He is persistent and not really frightened by us at all. Jan wishes she had an airgun so she could shoot the interloper. 

Both of us have stories that involve squirrels. My attic was once invaded by a little family of these rodents who nested in the eaves right above my bed. They were noisy, especially at night. I would have shot right through the ceiling to quiet them. Instead I paid more money than I could afford to have a specialist get rid of them. Jan’s story involves her car, parked on the lot of her work building. A family of squirrels, in one day, built a nest under the hood and chewed a lot of the wiring. She called a guy who got rid of them but warned her that they might find the same place again – and they did! So neither of us is fond of the little bastards.

I worry about our local bird population. We used to have four nice trees right behind our place, and those trees were home to some Cardinals and lots of sparrows. Unfortunately, they were not a wise choice on the builder’s part because all four trees died at the end of last year. So a couple of weeks ago, a crew came in and took them down. I was sure that this would stop the use of the feeder and that made me sad. However, these birds have found new homes in other trees around us and are happy to remember where the restaurant is located. 

There is something delightful about feeding birds. I can watch their little selves flying and landing to eat, hopping on the ground to find seeds that have fallen out of the feeder, and showing mostly good manners. When I think of how my species treats our environment and the creatures that inhabit it, I am happy to do a little bit for our neighborhood feathered residents. 

06/02/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Allegro con brio

Yesterday afternoon I went to Kirkwood for a short respite from politics, from the foolishness of this administration, and, well, from life in general. This marked the fourth time I have attended a concert at Kirkwood’s First Presbyterian Church. The building itself is magnificent and has been in existence in one form or another since 1888. The interior space seats hundreds of people and the acoustics are wonderful. Backing the pulpit and choir area are a series of gorgeous stained glass windows. As if the music were not enough, the colors of the windows and the messages they carry make the experience even more  meaningful.

I went there to hear a performance by Allegro: A St. Louis Choral Community. This group is for “anyone 50 years or older who wants to sing”. I joined after the New Year in order to be a part of the music making, led by Merry Keller. I had no idea what to expect and I was blown away by her style of teaching and directing mostly non-professional music lovers.

 I have belonged to choirs since my college years when I discovered the pure joy of blending voices and sending notes and words into the ether. My first choir director was Dr. Monroe Bell who coached me through a brief audition. As nervous as I was, he made the experience possible and placed me in the Alto section. That has been my resting place through all my choir experiences, with a brief stint as a Tenor when I lived in Santa Fe. In my opinion, Altos are the backbone of any group singing in parts. 

Allegro rehearses in the sanctuary of my church, Parkway United Church of Christ. I went to my first rehearsal, delighted to have an opportunity to sing in a group. Our director, Merry Keller, is known to me because she occasionally provided music for my former church and I always loved it when she played the piano and sang. I know of her through having sung under her direction in Charis, years ago. We also know a couple of people in common.

I did not know what to expect from her as a director. I found out she is a force to be reckoned with in her style of working with a large group. As a singer, I appreciate the effort that goes into her work. Each person in the choir receives a recording of their part for each song that is to be a part of a performance. She uses any opportunity to teach proper technique for singing efficiently, gives a history of each song to be sung, and does it with a firm but good-humored style. I loved her choice of songs as well.

But yesterday I found myself in the audience, instead of in the choir loft, due to a Spring cold and sore throat that affected my voice for weeks. I missed enough rehearsals to know that I would not be as prepared as it takes to sing in this group. 

I took my seat and read through the program. The concert started and the audience was riveted to the sounds of tens of singers. It meant a lot to me to be familiar with the music. The performance sounded flawless to me. At its’ conclusion audience members around me were commenting on the outstanding singing. I was sitting quietly, moved to tears by the last offering – a choral combination of “We Shall Overcome” and “Lean On Me”, sung with the Legend Singers of St. Louis who were guest musicians at the performance.

As long as I live, I will be devoted to the time I have spent as part of a musical group. To me it is the same as being in the direct presence of God, praying through music and words. I plan on being in this great group for the Christmas concert.

05/30/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Life may change

At my work it is time for the summer interns to join us. They are law school students, mostly from Washington University and some from Saint Louis University. They work full time until August, or whenever the new semester starts. My colleague, Amanda, interviews the few that are interested in immigration law – most of them are choosing more “exciting” departments like Family Law or Housing or Child Legal Alliance. Some summers we don’t get an intern at all. 

Not this year. We have a second year student from Wash U who only wanted to work in immigration, so we welcomed her warmly this week. She now occupies my former cubby since I am ensconced in a real office. I thought I would miss being out in the open in the cubby warren, but I am enjoying having enough space to put all my things. My window looks out over Busch Stadiium. Not enough to see any action, but enough to remind me how much I enjoy being there. And I smile to myself each time I remember that I can park in our garage for free on game nights. That’s a savings of $20 – $30  right there!

Back to Greta. Before the summer is over, I’ll know more about her and where she comes from and where she hopes to go. I remember that, with our last intern who came from Wyoming, Beena and I decided we needed to introduce her to the joys of Indian food since she’d never had an opportunity to sample this wonderful food while growing up in a distant state. We took her to Flavors of India, a great place on Manchester, and she enjoyed the fare there.

Back to Greta again. I had an extra half hour so she came in to my office so I could explain to her what an Accredited Representative is allowed to do with the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services. Basically I am allowed to do everything that an Immigration attorney does, short of appearing in court with a client. That’s fine with me. There are enough mind-bending tasks for me to do without having to worry about appearing in front of his honor the judge!

She asked what kind of cases I have. I pointed out different clients on the whiteboard where all my people are listed and went over the different cases that I am in charge of. I told her about the quote from Hebrews in the Bible: “Let mutual love continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it”. (Hebrews 13:1). So, on my board there are at least 50 angels. 

She asked how we communicate with our clients. Since COVID struck we do far fewer in person appointments. The miracle of technology and USPS and FedEx means we rarely meet with clients in our offices anymore. My exception to that rule is whenever I have a Spanish speaking client who needs to give me a lot of information. That is hard to do over the phone, so I meet with them and can get what I need in less than an hour. And it gives them an opportunity to ask questions that they may not remember to ask over the phone. Our receptionist has been so impressed by the rapid fire Spanish that we speak that she has decided to learn Spanish. That will be such a gift since many callers to Legal Services are Spanish speakers only.

Greta noticed the two FedEx envelopes on my desk and asked about those cases. I explained what each envelope contained. At the end of my day, I told her, I stop at the FedEx mailbox downstairs to deposit the envelopes. It’s always a good ending to the work day.

The other day as I slipped a FedEx file into the pick-up box I said a little prayer for the client. A thought occurred to me. Each time I FedEx something to USCIS, someone’s life will be changed. It may take an inordinately long time, but I am proud to say that up in the Immigration Law Program office, we are in the business of changing lives.

05/27/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

High crimes and misdemeanors 

This phrase comes from our Constitution, Article II, Section 4. It refers to the removal of all civil officers of the United States for treason, bribery, or other “high crimes”. Apparently it is a sentence that has come under scrutiny because it does not specifically name the egregious acts. 

Of course, I am not a legal scholar, but I know bad behavior when I see it. This weekend, 47 gave two speeches in which he rambled off script. At the West Point Graduation he somehow got on to the subject of “trophy wives”, and at a Memorial Day speech he went off on immigration with false statistics about murderers and rapists pouring into the United States. 

What caught my attention more than anything that came out of his disordered brain was yet another threat aimed at Harvard University. This time he’s thinking he might take 3 Billion dollars of grant money away from this institution. It must infuriate him that Harvard does not appear to be shaken by his ridiculous and possibly illegal moves. An emeritus professor of law from Harvard, Lawrence Tribe, commented on 47’s deranged words from this weekend. He said if a family member got facts confused as much as 47 does, there would be plans made for an intervention. I think I remember him saying at the end, “We’ll see you in court!”.

A post on Sunday in 47’s truth social account he says he wants the names and countries of every international student enrolled at Harvard. This after he tried to bar the university from enrolling anyone in the United States on a student visa. To get this information, all he has to do is turn to his crooked Secretary of State. The State Department vets, and collects fees, from foreign students applying for student visas. All their information is readily available and from what I can tell, Marco Rubio has drunk the Kool-Aid and won’t hesitate to publish this information.

Both of my children are involved in education, so I tend to follow the news about these topics: all the way from the hilarious statement from the secretary of education, madame WWE, that A1 is a lovely addition to our classrooms, to the infuriating news about Harvard.

The fact that there is a campaign against granting students from other countries the ability to come here to study is not a subtle move against higher education institutions. Instead, it is a direct attempt to hurt them in their pocketbooks. Foreign students make up about 6% of college student bodies. Getting a student visa is not necessarily easy. It is not really expensive, but meeting the conditions is challenging. There must be proof that the student will be able to support him or her self and they must have the intention to return home upon graduation. Upon admission to an approved education provider there is an interview process to determine the applicant’s character, financial situation, and intentions for entering the United States.

I think the real point behind 47’s crack down on foreign students has to do with money. As I have come to believe, often the answer to most questions can be found by following the money. Foreign students usually pay full tuition, and room and board. In the 2023-24 academic year, international students contributed substantial amounts on tuition, fees, and other expenses. Colleges and Universities depend on this money. And, international students contributed $44 billion to the US economy that same year. 

In my opinion, this campaign against students from other countries is yet another way to attack our education system. The man who is vice president in 2021 gave a speech titled “The Universities are the Enemy”. He laid out a plan to “aggressively attack the universities in this country.” There is nothing subtle about this. Consider the fact that 25% of 47’s cabinet people graduated from Ivy League schools, including 7 from Harvard. Go figure. 

05/25/2025

Today’s blog 

Lynn Murphy Mark

The Promises

Today is an anniversary of sorts. It is the day that we started moving our stuff from Florida into our new condo here in Saint Louis. It was 2018 and we had made the decision to leave the Sunshine State behind in exchange for a place that has actual seasons. In the back of my mind was my memory of why I left Saint Louis in the first place – the long overcast winters. Santa Fe had beckoned for a long time and in 2009 I finally packed up and moved out there where there is no overcast anything, hardly ever. Then in 2012 we acquired a condo in Naples, Florida.

But we have deep roots in Saint Louis, and I think we were a little homesick. So we “downsized” for the second time, moving from a two bedroom condo into a one bedroom, compact place. In the ensuing seven years we have accumulated stuff and every square inch of storage space is taken up. 

One of the greatest gifts of this move was being back in the presence of precious friends. For me, existing in close proximity to Rose again is a delightful proposition. In fact, this afternoon we will watch Cardinals baseball together – a time honored tradition. Rose has been a teacher as well as a great friend and soul mate. One of the best things she did for me was to persist with her invitation for me to join AlAnon. This was nothing new. She had tried to get me there for many years and I resisted.

Finally, in June of 2018, I gave in. Now my Wednesday morning meeting is as important to me as work and church. In fact, it is a spiritual endeavor and a place where I can share my qualms and troubles. I can also share my experience, strength, and hope – the golden trio of 12 Step programs. 

It occurred to me this morning to explore the spiritual significance of the number 12. Wikipedia and Quora,com tell me that “the number 12 often represents completeness and wholeness, order and divine guidance.” In the Unity faith, the founder, Charles Fillmore, wrote about the 12 powers that we each are given by God. There are 12 Apostles, and 12 lunar months. Spiritually it can mean that one is on the right path, supported by a Higher Power.

In 12 Step life, its importance is obvious. The Steps are a way of life that emphasizes spiritual connections and an honest approach to life on life’s terms. In these programs there are also 12 Traditions, or methods and actions to support the functioning of any 12 Step group.

Then there are the 12 Promises found on pages 83 and 84 of the AA bible, the Big Book. Every week we recite the Promises at the end of our meeting. The words are among the most powerful in a book that is filled with wisdom and hope and reality. They are spiritual guarantees of living a clean life. While they are all compelling and helpful, I have two favorites to write about today. 

Promise # 11 says, “We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us”. I havw spent a baffling amount of time being baffled by what I see and hear. As a kid growing up in an alcoholic household I spent a lot of time wondering if what I was witnessing was “real” or “normal”. I wondered if I was supposed to try and fix things by being the best, most responsible child possible. These days I am absolutely mystified and baffled by what is going on in our country. I have learned, through my program, to listen to my intuition, my gut, the voice that tells me what I need to concentrate on to live in these times. 

Promise # 12 says, “We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.” In my entitled, all-powerful addict’s mind I used to believe that I was responsible for your peace of mind and mine too if I had enough time. Now I am learning that it is ok, and healthy, to rely on God when I have run out of ideas. I still like to solve things on my own first, but I’m getting better at saying, “I can’t. God can, I think I’ll let God.”

I am so grateful for all 12 of the Promises, all 12 of the Steps, and all 12 of the Traditions.

05/22/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

1970

Today I am really blasting the past. This year, 1970, was a big one for me. I graduated from college without a clue what to do with my education. I had a Liberal Arts degree because I had changed majors about three times, so my diploma reflected a wide-ranged education – one that I have never regretted. I floated to the language department, the history department, and finally settled in the biology and other sciences realm.

Once the Director of Nurses of Boone County Hospital, where I worked as a nurse’s aide, asked me what I was going to do with my degree and I had to admit that I had no idea. She steered me to a diploma nursing school in Saint Louis. This was another decision that I have not regretted. At least I had a plan.

In August of 1970 I moved into the dorm at Deaconess Hospital as a student in the School of Nursing. (For the record, that was so long ago that there is no longer a hospital building or dormitory standing. The St Louis Zoo bought the property and tore down the buildings where so many people came for health care, and so many of us came for a stellar nursing education.) It was a three year Diploma program, which means that we learned in classrooms, but mostly learned by putting our knowledge into play on each of the hospital specialties. We were given responsibilities that used our brains and our bodies on all three shifts. Head Nurses counted on us to help staff their units. We had a healthy respect for those battle-hardened women who had so much responsibility for the welfare of patients and staff alike. I remember practically all of their personalities and their commitment to providing competent services to all.

So, after four years in college dorms, I was facing another three years in the building that overlooked the edge of Forest Park. I have to say I wasn’t especially enthused about that aspect. I would be living on the Freshman floor with girls who had just graduated from High School. But because I was “older” (21 to their 18) I was granted a private room. I think the Deaconess Sisters who ran the school thought they should isolate me from the young things since I was the first college graduate they had ever admitted. Perhaps they thought I would teach the innocents things that only a mature college graduate would know. Instead, the group of wild child’s that I got to know taught me a thing or two about what they had really learned in High School.

We weathered three years of rigorous training. Back in the day, a Diploma nurse was considered the cream of the crop. There weren’t many four year college nursing programs available, so the Diploma programs were the industry standard for most of the first half of the twentieth century. But because Saint Louis is rich in very good hospitals, Saint Louis University and the University of Missouri established four year programs, emphasizing more the study of the art rather than the practical experience of being a floor nurse. Anyway, we were completely absorbed in our studies, regardless of location.

We lived and worked together for three long years with very short breaks in the action. Since we worked in the trenches, we developed deep friendships and became each others’ support systems. We labored and studied hard, and had the kind of fun that only young women in close proximity to each other can get into. 

Fifty-five years from the start of our time together some of us are still friends. We get together periodically to share a meal. In the past we have actually gone on two road trips. Once when I was still living in Florida, seven of us met for a long weekend at the beach. We traveled to Nashville to see one of our companions who was having health challenges. We have met in Saint Louis, with the out-of-towners flying in for the occasion. We have lost two of our precious friends at a too-young-to-die age and have mourned them together. 

As proof of our long memories, one of us, Ruthie, will be celebrating her mother’s 100^th birthday in July. Her mom, Mrs. Pratt, was the Head Nurse on the OB/GYN floor at Deaconess. She is an unforgettable part of our training and we each spent three months on her floor under her kind direction. The plan is to send her birthday cards reminding her how much she meant to so many nurses over her years there. 

When we get together these days there is some talk of our own health challenges – it’s a requirement when one reaches one’s 70’s. We tell the same funny stories about our experiences as young puppies. Mostly though, when we get together we talk heavily about politics. Our little group happens to be of one mind where social issues are concerned. I love looking at our somewhat weathered faces and remembering the freshness of our youth.

05/20/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Shame on you, Jake

Jake Tapper’s new book, Original Sin, comes out today. I will not be purchasing it, not because I’m not interested, but because I consider it a colossal waste of time to criticize the Biden presidency. Apparently the book “exposes” the “fact” that Biden’s mental decline began long before the disastrous debate with 47. It alleges that members of his administration and his family concocted a plot to hide his “incompetence”. 

Well, if Tapper is such a prescient journalist and reporter, why not tackle this story in real time? Oh, yes, that would take a certain measure of courage. Instead, wait until the subject is out of political life and take the opportunity to bash him.

So I had to write an email to Jake Tapper today. His address is Jacob.tapper@cnn.com if you are so inclined. Here’s what I wrote:

“I wonder if this message will even get to you, Jake Tapper, but here goes. I have heard about your book describing the alleged incompetence of President Joe Biden. I doubt that I will read it, but I do have thoughts about the chutzpah that you demonstrate by writing such a thing.

Regardless of his personal situation, Joe Biden managed to project decency and compassion to the American people. He surrounded himself with highly capable people who accomplished so much in one term in office.

It doesn’t take much courage to write an expose of the past. It does take courage to address the incompetence of this current administration. I don’t see you tackling this mess in a book that can already be written – only four months into a term. 

I’m not sure what your intent is in writing about a patriotic American who has served the public for decades. Why not expose the decades of grift and crime of our current president? Too controversial or dangerous for you to take on?

I hope your conscience is somewhat troubled by your choice to smear a decent man.”

I don’t doubt that 47 will crow about the material in this book. His minions are already blaming the Biden administration for all of the f@#k ups that they themselves are creating. This book will only fuel their baseless statements, and that is why I am so irritated by Jake Tapper’s incredible gall. 47 doesn’t need any more “ammunition” to fire up his MAGA base.

Do I think Joe Biden made a mistake by deciding to run again? Yes. Do I think we Democrats need to learn a lesson from last year’s disastrous election? Yes. Senator Chris Murphy has said as much on NBC’s Meet the Press: “It was a mistake for Democrats to not listen to the voters earlier and set up a process where we could have been more competitive that Fall.” I believe we actually paved the way for 47 to get another chance to destroy our Democracy.

As a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat, I plan on working as hard as I can on next year’s midterm elections. It’s our only chance to save what we are quickly losing. In the meantime I am praying that Joe Biden’s cancer diagnosis will be efficiently and carefully managed. I am praying that somehow cancer research projects will find funding as 47 strips it away from us all.

05/19/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

1985

Next month, on Friday, June 13, my youngest born will turn 40. I can’t emphasize enough how surprised I am that my children will be “in their 40’s”. It was only yesterday that they were little kids and life was all about caring for their precious selves and watching them grow into really good people. 

One of my sorrows is that they took my advice about how travel is the best education, and how leaving home is an adventure worth taking. I remember when Jackie left the USA for Berlin to live out her Fulbright Scholarship year. As we watched her walk down the hall to her flight, her Stepmom, Diane, commented that Jackie was braver than she ever was. They both have done a fair amount of traveling, especially Jackie. Anyway, my sorrow is a selfish one – they live far away, one on each coast.

But turning 40? I don’t think Ted is too excited either. Sarah has planned some surprises for him that should make the occasion pretty special. No spoiler alert here. It will all remain under wraps until it happens. 

The two of them have been together for at least 18 years, minus one year when they took a hiatus from each other. I am eternally grateful that they are together. Being in their presence is soul-affirming because it’s so obvious how much they love each other and are committed to one another. It is a great comfort to me being so far away and pretty distanced from their everyday lives. 

Ted was a curly-haired toddler. This many years later there is still some curl left on his head. He was only two when his father and I divorced. He grew up traveling between two homes and life was one big exercise in making sure that the right stuff got to the right house on the right days. Now his house is very well organized, with a particular place for each possession. Both he and Sarah are into neat environments and live comfortably in a small apartment in Korea Town, Los Angeles. 

Although Ted has never taken the Enneagram test I have done what we’re not supposed to do. I’ve studied the Enneagram enough to know a little about each personality type so I have concluded that he is a “5” on this 9 point personality chart. A 5 is known as “The Investigator”. This is a person who has a rich inner mental realm who reaches feeling through thought processes. Fives are information junkies who love knowledge and seek expertise and mastery. He is a person who “Prepares and Reviews”, preparing for an event before then analyzing it afterward. Fives tend to be minimalists, which I would have to say is how Ted prefers to live. 

While he is tenderhearted, he is also able to withdraw into a mental realm where he finds respite from the world. He and Sarah are perfectly content to live as much off the grid as they can when they are home. Neither one of them is especially fond of their telephones.

My Enneagram ap tells me a lot more about each personality type. There is a section for “tips” for being in the company of type 5. As I read through the tips I can check off how many fit Ted. He is objective, precise and thorough. He develops in-depth mastery and has a love of learning – hence is lengthy pursuit of a PhD in the heady realm of philosophy. He has been a deep thinker since early childhood.

One night during the first Gulf War, I was tucking him in. He was five at the time. The news was filled with reports of burning oil wells over there and there was some concern that oil might be scarce that winter. Ted was very worried about people who would need oil for heat. As I knelt by his bed he asked me, “Why is it that most people feel things at the top of their hearts and I feel things all the way at the bottom of mine?” 

That kind of question requires an answer. All I could say at the time was that he had been given a gift, one that might hurt sometimes. I told him that he would be able to be a compassionate, helpful person, and that would make all the difference. I was not wrong on that night 35 years ago.

05/17/2025

Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Enya

The other day we were at a friend’s house for coffee. She had soft music playing in the background, and I recognized it as a collection of Mozart pieces. When I mentioned it and said I love Mozart, she said, “You know who else I love? Enya!”. The next thing I knew, Alexa was playing a string of Enya classics. Now, my playlists on iTunes are loaded with favorites that I have downloaded/bought over quite a few decades. I used to move around accompanied by a huge folio of music CD’s.

About 5 of those CD’s were Enya’s. Over time, I have gotten rid of the CD folio and relied on iTunes on my computer. Somehow, Enya’s music never got loaded into any previous versions of Macintosh laptops. That surprises me because I am a big fan of this Irish songstress and composer. Her music is characterized by a whole lot of layering of her voice to produce gorgeous harmonies of herself singing with herself. 

Off to iTunes I went and bought two of her albums that I used to own. Now I have an Enya playlist, relatively inexpensive at this time due to how long she has been around. What is cool is that today is her 64^th birthday. I just gave her a few pennies in royalties for her big day.

She was born Eithne Padraigin Ni Bhraonain. In our speak that becomes Enya Patricia Brennan. I’ll have to get my Irish friend Mary to say that in Irish. It turns out that she is the best selling music act from Ireland, second only to U2. She has sold around 90 million albums making her a wildly successful “New Age” artist. She also owns four Grammy Awards, and is the most nominated female Irish artist in British musical awards history.

My only connection with her, besides my admiration, is that she was born in County Donegal, Ireland. I have been there with my kids to visit a small town where one of our ancestors is buried. We also had lunch at a pub in town. Lunch consisted of some food and big glasses of that dark rich Guiness beer. Guiness almost counts as lunch by itself, but we felt we had to accompany it with some actual food.

Enya’s music speaks to me. I love the gentle harmonies she creates by layering tracks of her voice. I listened to her a lot in the 1990’s and 2000’s, often using her music to center me when I was cutting glass for my stained glass projects. To me, this music opens up some creative pathway that leads to a feeling of belonging in the flow of energy from the Universe. I spent a lot of hours interacting with her music and with sheets of colored glass, steering the glass cutter in difficult curves and angles. 

She was one of nine children, born to people with a musical bent. She tells the story that there was “continual hustle and bustle and crying and chaos” in her house. She was fine with that because it meant she could be relatively invisible and left to her own devices. I’ll bet that the quiet nature of her music has something to do with escaping the chaos of her childhood. 

She has continued her search for privacy by being an actual recluse. She lives in a big Victorian mansion where she can be relatively alone to compose. She is wealthy, in fact her fortune in female musician UK terms is second only to that of Adele. She has never been on tour, so there’s no need for me to check out her performance schedule. I am content to hear her through my ear buds. I love the interior calm of her music.